Just Over Zero

This is another day when the temperature is in the 20's, but feels 10 degrees colder. This will be my third consecutive day spent indoors, trying to stay warm.

There are other places suffering through even crappier weather than this, and Iowa is probably one of them. The infamous Iowa caucus was held yesterday, and El Pedo Grande was the winner as expected. Here's the good news: Iowa is one of the very worst red state shitholes, and El Pedo only got about 51% of the vote. Simple arithmetic confirms that nearly half of the most-determined voters in a red state shithole wanted someone other than El Stinko Grande.

In 2016, El Pedo was mainly known as a TV performer playing a successful businessman on a network reality show. With plenty of help from Russia and Democrats who voted for Jill Stein, he won the EC despite losing the popular vote. Now it's eight years later, and he's no longer the 2016 Untested Quantity. His first term led to his defeat in 2020, and I can't think of anything he's done since then that would make him more popular now than he was in 2016.

Making Excuses

Soon after the 2016 election, I couldn't type his given name without needing to vomit, so I began to insert some insulting alternatives instead. Now that former guy Sicko Stinko is planning to use "The dog ate my homework" excuses as his trial defense, I expect I'll start referring to him as Mr. Misfortune.

He's crazier than a shithouse rat.

Q NOTES # 879: Still More News, Briefly

Did Donny Docs understand that in a civil suit (like the one the New York AG has brought against him), a 5th Amendment refusal to answer is equivalent to admitting his guilt?

Okay, now bury the waste of shit in an avalanche of penalties.

Attorney General Merrick Garland is not somebody Donny Docs needs to be dicking around with, but he has to learn the hard way.

Waste of Shit #1 hopes he can run a misdirection play by accusing Barack Obama of getting away with doing the same thing he's doing. Is he deliberately lying, or is he just so damned stupid he can't understand why he's in deep shit and Obama isn't? 

Some Trumplickans are guilty of enabling Waste of Shit #1 by looking the other way while he was on his crime spree, but there are even more who actively participated in it. The current Trumplickan panic is understandable since nearly all will suffer some level of guilt by association. But many may be facing more serious consequences. They know who they are.

PS: Waste of Shit #1 is pulling one of his typical stunts, "encouraging" the DOJ to unseal and release the Mar-a-Loogie search warrant, which he plans to belittle as something concocted as part of a secret conspiracy to persecute him. Only the dimmest of the MAGA deplorable dimwits will fall for this horse manure.

Q NOTES # 784: Mother's Day Mumbling

According to people who've devoted time and effort to studying and documenting Donnie Dump Lump's activities in public life, it's generally understood that everything he touches eventually turns to shit and dies. He got heavily involved with Pootin and Russia, and see what's happening to Russia's invasion of Ukraine (supported by Dump Lump) now.

Speaking of mothers, Moscow Mitch has come just short of promising that if Trumplicans regain the Congressional majority, they'll deliver a national ban on abortion. Even Slick Sammy Alito hasn't pushed the markers that far yet.

SLICK SAMMY ENJOYING HIS MOMENT

Q NOTES # 737: Sound Advice?

The four years that Donald Nacho was in the White House are probably the longest national nightmare in American history that didn't involve prolonged military activity, e.g., the Civil War. Because it was like a really bad dream, nothing that pops up about actions, statements. or anything else that happened then can be dismissed as too ridiculous to be true. Would Nacho really ask some waste of space like Kid Rock for advice on a foreign policy matter? If he thought Kid Rock was a suitable golf partner, why wouldn't he? After all, his whole precedence (sic) was essentially what you'd get if you crossed a terrible TV sitcom with the worst TV reality show ever produced.

Speaking of really, really bad TV, there's not much that's more sickening than watching putrid TrumpunKKKs like L. Graham, J. Hawley or J. Jordan using their questions in committee hearings to score cheap political points with hicks, yahoos, and bottom-feeding dimwits.

Q NOTES, DAY 261: The Big Con

If what I'm reading is correct, we now know that Cheez Doodle has at least 150,000,000 reasons to keep going with this fucking foolish bullshit about trying to overturn the election. The good news? That's 150 million bucks that won't be going to the campaigns of (R) candidates who might have a real chance to win elections. To put it as simply as possible, there are no other people on earth as stupid and hopelessly fucked up as Cheez Doodle's devoted followers.

The research shows there are a lot of people out there whose only interest in politics is linked to the opportunity to vote for Cheez Doodle. Once he's out of the picture, they'll disappear like fucking cockroaches. Obviously we're talking about the lowest of the lowlifes. 

Prepare to add Booger Bill Barr to the official Cheez Doodle shit list. If Cheezy can no longer count on the Booger Man, who can he count on? 

Question of the hour: If Cheezy and his team of assholes really do have mountains of evidence that prove the election was stolen from the hair god, why in the ever-lovin' fuck have they not presented that evidence in any of the lawsuits that have made it to court so far? Do any of the worthless nose-pickers who are sending their money to Cheezy ever ask themselves why the proof is being kept under wraps?

Ridiculous new lawsuits filed in Michigan and Wisconsin, demanding that Cheez Doodle be declared the winner of the election. I guess that fat motherfucker will keep doing shit like this as long as the money keeps pouring in.

Q NOTES, DAY 259: Descending Into Madness

Sundays are always slow days when it comes to interesting news, which is probably why Cheez Doodle's phone interview on Fox News with a bimbo named Maria Bartiromo is getting so much attention. The chat is only worth mentioning because we got a glimpse of Cheezy inching toward complete insanity while it was happening.

Cheezy has been attacking Fox News since election night, when they were the first network to call Arizona for Biden. He's been urging his zombie army to abandon Fox News and watch One America News Network (OANN) instead. I've read that OANN is like FNC without all the objective, unbiased reporting (if you can imagine that). Cheezy knows more people watch FNC, so he's forced to crawl to them if he wants his message of the day to get the widest possible TV exposure. 

Wanting to destroy Fox News while simultaneously realizing he can't survive without them must be a terrible dilemma for an asshole who convinced himself he's the top dog in every transaction. Maybe the conflict caused him to suggest he'll continue fighting to have the election overturned for six more months, and that gaining House seats and holding the Senate majority proves the election was rigged to cheat him personally (since other (R) candidates won). He ranted about "massive dumps" (referring to ballots, not bowel movements), then implied that Booger Bill Barr, the DOJ, the FBI, and all those state court judges are part of a conspiracy to withhold the justice he deserves as the victim of the biggest election fraud scandal in history.

Cheez Doodle wants his grievances presented before the U.S. Supreme Court so much he can taste it, but maybe worries that a 5-4 vote against him would make it harder to keep those donations pouring in. He's already losing followers on Twitter, the people who aren't as insane as he is.

This is a side of life Cheezy's never had to cope with until now.

Q NOTES, DAY 251: Transition

Now that Pennsylvania, Michigan and Georgia appear to be beyond the reach of Cheez Doodle's half-assed dream of overturning the 2020 election, it's time to start the process of thinking about him in the past tense (even though we're stuck with him for two more months).

The media chatter seems to be transitioning away from things Cheezy already did, or things he's doing now, and is gradually being replaced by chatter about things he's going to do in the future. The crux of the discussion is apparently the 2024 election and Cheezy's role in it (as if most people aren't electioned out by now). 

I despise the hideous motherfucker for hundreds of reasons I've already written about, so my personal hope is that his future includes a lot of financial ruin and legal jeopardy. I may be wrong, but I expect that after he's not in the most powerful government position in the world anymore (and he never should've been), a good bit of his mystique will vanish. When he has the ability to start wars on a whim, he's interesting in ways that he can never be as just another show biz personality, which appears to be his destiny for the next few years, assuming he can put together the financial support it will require..

One notable characteristic of Americans these days is their short attention spans. For four years, Cheezy has been front-page news damn near every minute of every day. Even his goddamned Twitter activity is headline material. To the extent that his media coverage is reduced (as it should be), I don't see most people spending time trying to locate reports on his opinions and activities. Maybe they will, but I have doubts. It's easier to ignore Cheezy when he's not in your face all the time.

Assuming therefore that Cheezy no longer commands constant media attention, and that some of the focus he does receive will be all about his desperate efforts to hang on to his properties and stay out of courtrooms, how will he maintain his grip on the (R) Party? In four years, he'll be 78 years old. He's not going to transform his rotten personality, or get any smarter or less corrupt. He'll still be a sociopath, but more demented. Are all those younger hotshots, ambitious and anxious to rise in the party's hierarchy themselves, willing to piss away the next eight years of their careers while they wait for Cheezy to finally sail off into the sunset?  Is this where the party wants to pin its hopes and dreams? We'll see. Never underestimate the stupidity of people who would vote for something like Cheezy in the first place.

Update No. 1 3:05 PM: Daily Kos @ Cheezy loyalists in Georgia are so mad they're threatening to boycott the Senate run-off election. Wouldn't that be terrible? 

Happy News

The top priority in The Blob's ad-menstruation (sic) is to conceal information and misrepresent facts. That's why it's no surprise that states are being asked to "blur" the numbers related to unemployment compensation claims. For Donnie, the TV ratings get a boost if his show is nothing but smiley faces around the clock.

Banner Abuse

Donnie Droppings has this new gimmick that he uses whenever he wants to show off for right-wing audiences: He hugs the American flag as he enters or leaves the stage. Lately, he's added a new twist -- he kisses Old Glory while clutching her. The Grabber apparently loves to hug and kiss the flag almost as much as he enjoys feeling Ivanka's butt. I think it's because both of them go along with it instead of kneeing him in the crotch.

Can you imagine how RWers would react if Barack Obama hugged and kissed the flag one single time?

Hit Man

The questions for tonight: Was so-called precedent (sic) Sharpie involved in a plan to order a hit on a U.S. ambassador? Are there any compelling reasons to believe he would NOT be involved in such plans?

The Last Words

When the time finally comes, the Pustule's obituary should read as follows:

"This asshole's biggest mistake was believing every American was as fucking stupid as the ones who voted for him."

Update 2:15 PM Saturday: How fucking stupid are they? Well, for starters, they're already contemplating the future precedences (sic) of Junior and Ivanka.

Take a deep breath.

Crooks and Liars reminds us that all the stuff we think we know about the whistleblower complaint is based on strategic leaks to the media by the White House. Since the actual report has been buried  (so far), we're only getting the version they want us to have. One thing we can be sure about is that whatever Donny S. Hole did, it's a lot worse than what we've been told to this point.

And as Kos reminds us, it's always a dumb move to be glad that Moscow Mitch finally did something decent, because he never does anything decent. He's rotten to the core, and that won't ever change. Decency isn't part of his makeup.

Hey, Donny S. Hole, go eat three gallons of chicken-fried dicks smothered in creamy shit gravy.

Not too Sharpie

Okay, I'm convinced that Donny Guano was put here to turn everything he touches to shit. Now he believes he can create reality with a Sharpie marker.

Added 3:20 PM Friday: Donny Dog Turd always finds a way to turn a quick buck off his widely publicized fuck-ups, which is only possible because his followers are the dumbest assholes in the world. Even a mediocre con man can successfully fleece those fucking losers year after year.

Congratulations, Poland!

Since Donny Guano needs to stay home to keep an eye on his real estate in Florida, he sent Pence to attend the ceremonies in Poland on the 80th anniversary of the German invasion that officially began World War II. But Donny wants Poland to know that he sends his congratulations.

There's no single thing that he's expected to do as so-called precedent (sic) that he doesn't fuck up through ignorance, laziness, incompetence, or corruption.

Category 5 what?

The motherfucker is just mailing it in as usual. Hard to figure out if he's demented, or if he just plain doesn't give a shit.

PS: Hullabaloo on hurricane-related conspiracy theory

And Juanita Jean's sums it all up real well.

His fee-fees are hurt.

Reporting in USA TODAY confirms Donnie's not only fat and stupid, he's repulsive and full of himself. The Danish prime minister took her sledge hammer to his ego:

 “She’s not talking to me. She’s talking to the United States of America," Trump said. 

No, motherfucker, she's specifically talking to one asshole, which is you.

Natural Selection

Hopefully, authoritative histories of Donny Stink Eye's single term will be written in the next 2-3 years. Chapters will be devoted to this question: How was it possible that virtually every member of Stink Eye's so-called "administration" was a filthy piece of shit, a rotten sociopath, a corrupt grifter, etc?

Hullabaloo offers a look at the circumstances that enabled Stink Eye to assemble so many corrupt, incompetent scumbags so rapidly.

Made for each other

Donny Stink Eye has made it okay to be fat, stupid, and degenerate. It's no wonder so many of those worthless (R) people love him to death.

Clarification needed. Please explain.

To quote Denzel Washington in the movie Philadelphia, explain this to me like I'm a two-year-old.

So-called precedent (sic) Donny Stink Eye has a current approval rating around 38 percent, and a sizable majority of voters have already decided there's no way they'll vote for him. For some reason, the mainstream media are telling me that an impeachment proceeding against him will strengthen rather than weaken Stink Eye. He'll be more popular than he is now, and will win a landslide election next year.

So explain it to me like I'm two years old: How is that possible? Or are they just making up shit like they did in 2016? Which voters are going to switch their support to Stink Eye?

So far, the courts are deciding in favor of the House Democrats.

Suppose health care remains the issue most voters are concerned about. How is being impeached going to make Stink Eye's health care agenda a national best-seller?

And how about Stink Eye's border fence that apparently costs about 1,000,000,000 bucks per linear mile? Is that a winner for the fat fuck?

Maybe Stink Eye wouldn't be forcing Madam Speaker to fry his ass unless he's hatched another of his brilliant master plans to turn the tables in his favor. You think that's what they actually believe? 

Fear the Stink Eye!