Saturday, August 25, 2012

Has it been five years already?

I started writing blogs for real on September 28th, 2007. I knew it was a hobby I'd enjoy if I could find enough topics to write about. Sure enough, a few days later, I had my first colon screening, and I wrote about it on October 1st. It doesn't seem possible that was nearly five years ago, but you know what they say... time flies when you're having fun.

Anyway, I had my annual physical a few days ago, and my doctor decided I needed a fifth-year followup colon exam, which was eventually scheduled for Monday at 10:20 AM. Tomorrow (Sunday) I stick to the limited diet (beef or chicken broth, apple juice, orange or lemon jello, etc), with assorted laxatives for good measure. It's a pain in the ass, figuratively speaking. Actually, if everything goes as it did in 2007, there won't be any physical pain at all. Of course, I'm old enough that I always hate being poked and prodded by medical people because I'm afraid they'll find something bad that will mess up my plans.

We'll see how things go. More later.

Added 11:20 on Sunday 26 August: It's a weird fact of life -- I always feel hungriest when I know I'm not allowed to eat solid food.

Added 5:38 pm on Monday 27 August: All done, one polyp, now excised. The laxatives finally kicked in at 5:00 AM. Official weight loss from Sunday = 2.4 pounds. Anyone who wants an exact measurement of how much shit I'm full of now has it -- just over two pounds. The sedation is wearing off now, but for a few hours I was as light-headed as I was the night I smoked my first few cigarettes, drinking coffee at the motel.

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Dedicated to Jim Ferguson. If you don't know who Jim Ferguson is, you (a) haven't seen The Missouri Breaks, or (b) have an inadequate ability to fully assimilate movie trivia.